A Heartfelt Letter by an NYU Shanghai Mom

Dear MengMeng,

This is my second letter to you. The first one (for your coming-of-age ceremony this year), was something your school assigned, but now I’m writing to you just because I wanted to. You might be curious to why I’d choose to write a letter when we have more convenient ways to keep in touch. Sure, I can easily find out about your daily life by checking your QQ updates, or see what you’re up to in our family WeChat group, but this letter isn’t about convenience. With the busyness of work keeping me away from home for days on end, I couldn’t even properly see you off for your journey to NYU Shanghai. I missed the chance to say what I was hoping to say for a long time--so in this moment, writing a letter the old-fashioned way, here’s what I wanted to tell you:

When your father and I visited you at your dorm yesterday, your excitement and happiness was palpable. You proudly showed off your bathroom, kitchen, the different kinds of dorms and the functions of each common space. You greeted your classmates with an easy-going friendliness that showed how engaged you already were in the community. It relieved your father and I.

When we took part in some of the welcome activities, I could feel my confidence growing in this place, and that NYU Shanghai was the right choice. When staff members enthusiastically helped us store luggage, we felt their genuine kindness and care.  When all the parents stood and applauded the students for a long time, we felt the sincerity of a student-centered and creative place. When you lit up the symbol of “2020” on the board with your classmates, when you found your own name on the wall, did you also feel a glow of positivity and confidence in your new school?

During the opening ceremony, Chancellor Yu, Vice Chancellor Lehman and Provost Waley-Cohen delivered speeches in English, which I saw you enjoying--bursting out laughing at times. Like most of the Chinese parents, I could only keep up with the translations on the screen, but I was proud to see that you seemed to unearth a true understanding of their messages. I hope that you can answer the questions given by Chancellor Yu, achieve the three tasks delivered by Vice Chancellor Lehman, and make a list--as Provost Waley-Cohen advised--comparing what you achieve with what you have written down. I hope that in these four years at NYU Shanghai, you are eager to accept challenges, improve yourself, “make the world your major,” and ultimately flourish in your life.

From now on, not only you, but your father and I need to adapt. We have to adapt to the long days without your company, have to accept the fact that you have grown up and gone away. With this thought, I am aware that all kinds of love in the world celebrate togetherness, but the love from one’s parents exists also in separation. When the day for separating comes, although it may be a sorrowful time, I will remind myself to be rational.

From now on in this new environment, you will learn and make progress continuously; I will also work harder, as your mother, to match the ideas of the education of NYU Shanghai. Tomorrow is the beginning of a new week of the rest of your life, and I hope for you it is a great one.

With love,

your mom

The Author of this letter is Cao Qiaolan, a Class of 2020 NYU Shanghai mom.